PLAYING BUDDHA.
I feel so fulfilled at the moment because finally, the physics exam is uber and so what’s left with me now to deal are the minor subjects. "Hay nakatapos din ng one full sem"
I’m looking forward to enroll this summer because, yeah I know that sounds very very "are you nuts?" But I have nothing to do anyways, my friends, they are all in province and I just want to get rid of the boring subjects ex:polsci and asianciv. I just hope that I get to enroll at healthstat this summer, because I dont want to be bombarded with numbers when june comes. I hate numbers as in!! I feel schizophrenic when I see them..especially on exams. Too bad I still need to finish the curriculum issued this sem, meaning STS (watever that means) and Biochem, to name a few, are sheets that I cannot escape nanu man ing gawan ko!
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We went to my dear Charlie’s place a while ago just to kill time. And we went to U.K(lam mo yan!) and Ana and I were just extremely happy when we found worthy stuff to buy.O_O Yey! black flats!! We took shower altogether, yes we’re all girls anyway! And suddenly my childhood memories just all came back to me at once. I miss my province so much! Arggh I want to cry! I miss the cows, the carabaos/buffaloes, goats, bamboo. The tadpoles the river at our backyard the dragonflies. I remember how Jelbie (haha, my childhood friend, my neighbor & my constant competition at school during gradeskul) and I catch butterflies and dragonflies and intentionally wear red to attract cows and let them go wild and they will run after us.AHH. I miss my old life really. I remember also how my Lola would hit me a slipper because again,with my friends, I got wet playing on the river killing newborn fishes, yes I know that’s so Inhumane but we are children on those days and we just don’t care!
And as I lingered back on those carefree days of mine, I noticed how big the changes occurred to me and to my friend Jelbie are. Example, he is an engineer in the making, I admit he was always the winner when it comes to math competitions. While me, my family still surrender me at the "Asylum" when my lunacies attacks, but unlike my friend, I’m still the sexless drunkard struggling to feel the real meaning of life. This meaninglessness (as Lestat call it) is bugging me, I feel like I’m just a robot whose lack of capacity for human emotions is often emphasized. I make other people smile but at the end of day i still feel somehow, futile. No, it’s not that I am not a good driver, maybe the road is too lubricated that I keep on bumping at the trees and destroying road signs. I wish for enlightenment to hit me!
ai ali ku pa pala mamangan baka maranup kumu kaya ali kuna balu ing panyabyan ku.
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